I was finally feeling well enough to wrench myself out of bed and downstairs to clean up a mess I have left sitting in the sink for far too long. I found my Mom troubling over the disarrangement of the food stuffs in our pantry to my Dad who sat reading the newspaper and eating peanut butter and crackers at the kitchen table.

My appearance was met with a synchronized "Whadaya doin?" To which I answered that I was feeling strong enough to clean the mess I made during a frenzied pancake pursuit earlier in the day.

About three minutes had passed when again my Dad looks up from the paper, laughs and says, "Molly, whadaya doin' down here. I thought you were sick."

This time it was mother and I who answered in sync, "The dishes."

"Oh."

Thinking it was time for some good old fashioned conversation I said to my Dad, "So...peanut butter and crackers huh Dad?"

Dad (sarcastically):"Oh yeah, they're the best thing goin' these days."

Me (snidely enthusiatic): "Yep, they're the salt of the earth."

At this point it seemed that the conversation had grown tiresome for Dad and he left the room with his standard swat into the air, and "ah..."(pronounced with a long a.)

As Dad exits down the hallway, Mom, now at the sink running water, sneers under her breath, "Yeah, more like the lummox of the Earth if ya ask me."

I swear its like I am conducting my life from the set of the Honeymooners or All in the Family, can anyone help me? Find the magic remote! Change the channel! Before its too late!

I am thinking now that I might take a shower so that even though I might be suffering away at the hand of some unnamed virus, I will be doing so hygenically and in a civilized manner.

17 August 2002 - 2:39 PM

previous * next