We hope to be able to mash; a dog show in Palm Springs, dinner at Medieval Times and dinner at Wild West, which are both near Anaheim, all into one weekend. We tried to enlist Tom but he seems to have reservations about vacationing behind what he calls "The Orange Curtain."

Ha! "The Orange Curtain" that really cracks my shit up.

Also, last night was the company X-mas party. Boy oh boy...what a mess that ended up to be.

It started off okay, I guess but me in my dress-up clothes at a fancy party with free alcohol equals trouble. More specifically it equals me hanging my head out of the window of a taxi and vomiting.

In honor of this unsightly event (and a few others that are detailed below,) I have decided upon a New Year's resolution. In 2003, I plan to avoid any and all company Xmas parties. Xmas parties never end well for me, in fact, more often than not, they make me vomit.

Oh boy...one Xmas party in San Diego took the cake though. I believe it was the one where I accused the managerial staff of the restaurant I worked at of being fascists while drinking beer straight out of the pitchers the bartenders had set out for everyone's use. Later I was seen kissing one the very same managers and then a fellow barista. The after party was my proudest moment. That was where, while I sat listening to the details of my other manager's divorce, I was hit with a spell of the spins and while running toward the bathroom to vomit fell flat on my back and started crying.

Then a number of the male members of the party tried to pick me up and carry me to the bathroom but I freaked out and started kicking and squirming to free myself. And I did free myself and made it to the restroom where I fell asleep on the tile, but not before creating quite a mess, if you catch what I'm saying.

I woke up the next morning alone in the bed of a co-worker. He was on the floor next to a bucket of vomit which I thought was his but was later told it was my own. Well I was half right at least, the bucket was his.

About an hour later after the shakes had subsided we walked over to our restaurant to have lunch. I don't think I made a very good impression by showing up there at 1pm the day after the Xmas party still wearing the same clothes but really I had no choice.

Then I tried to go home but upon arrival discovered that the stairway leading to my walk-up apartment had been torn down. So I decided I would go smoke lots of weed with my friend Tara until very late into the evening.

It all worked out well though because due to my excessive drinking at the party I missed some study group or I think they called it a "discussion section" where role was taken and your grade was docked a little for every class you missed. I was able to use the excuse of waking up to a torn-down stairway though, in order to avoid losing those precious grade points.

Then there was the other Xmas party where I came down with some alcohol poisoning.

Leaving San Diego really cut back of the amount of vomit I produce but I think I still need something extra. So it makes sense to me this New Year's to do myself a favor and stop going to those company parties.

They're no good, no good at all. They've never done me any favors and now, with my new resolution, they will never even have the chance.

17 December 2002 - 11:22 PM

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